Monday, August 4, 2008

Dolly vs. Delta

I was just thinking back to Hurricane Dolly. Seriously, World Meteorological Organization... Dolly? If Hurricane Dolly would have had a better name it would have gotten much more tv time. What is so threatening about a storm that goes by the name of Dolly? All I picture is a big Dolly Parton twirling around above the ocean with her super-sized hoo hoos, painted on jeans and her blonde wig. She could barely hurt a fly while she shakes her tambourine against her sequin covered legs.

You know who would be a better hurricane? Delta, that's who. Imagine a raging, ticked off Delta Burke twirling around above the ocean. This ain't no "Suzanne Sugarbaker" Delta Burke. It's a Delta Burk ticked-off-beceause-she-got-fired-from-Designing Women-for-gaining-weight Delta Burke. Imagine the big black hair, the deep blue eye shadow, red lipsitck... and bad 80's suit. Now that's a storm.
Actually, now that I look at a pic of Dolly... I might take it all back.


Becca said...

I think you're right Suz, Hurricane Delta would lay a wide trail of destruction. Dolly would just make everything it touched a little more fancy.

BTW, did you know there's going to be a musical version of "9 to 5" on Broadway soon? Dolly won't be in it, but she's writing all the music.

amanda said...

fo' shizz. i think the next few hurricanes should be hurricane elizabeth taylor, hurricane rosie o'donnell, and hurricane kathie lee gifford. all those women are coo-coo for cocoa puffs and incite all sorts of mayhem in their path.